TAMMY'S

:D

Notice anything different?
I removed my braces (which I had on for one year and nine months) this morning.

:D

My darling is baaaack!

Went down to Tanah Merah Ferry Terminal to “fetch” him. As his arrival time neared, my heart started beating faster and faster. Too excited to see him. Haha.

Anyway, he said he had a surprise for me and I thought maybe he bought me something nice. But it turned out that he did not just buy one thing, but a bag full of gifts! I was sooo touched. :)

He bought me two tops, a pair of shoes, a wallet and Escada perfume. I was so so so amazed. And I love every single one of his gifts. Even my mum said he knows how to buy stuff when she saw them. I love the material gifts, but more than that, I love the thoughts he had behind buying me those stuff. He gave me what he knew I would love, and he put in the effort. It’s true that you can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving.

I accompanied him down for his family photoshoot and then he had to go for AC practice so I took a bus home, a very happy girl indeed.

At the end of it all, our love, so deep, so real, conquers all.

:(

It’s a sinking feeling that weighs my heart down and nauseates my stomach. It feels like I’ve hit a road block – there’s an enormous wall in front of me, and I can’t do anything to break it down. There’s nothing around me. No hammer, no drill, no nothing. Or rather, I’ve tried to break the wall down before, but nothing worked.

Life’s like a journey on a road. Sometimes you cruise through, with pretty flowers around for you to stop and sniff at. With big fields for you to run about in and shout and have fun. But these roads also have walls that are placed every few hundred metres away. There’re there to stumble you, to frustrate you, to make you feel helpless and hopeless. But if you can find the right way to break the walls down, then hooray to you, you’ve found a way to deal with similar walls in the future. But if you can’t, then you’re stuck. You’re left there to feel helpless and hopeless. You cry out for help, but help doesn’t seem to come soon enough. You’ve run out of ideas. You can only look at the wall and cry in despair. You ask yourself: This wall has stumbled me before. Why can’t I overcome it now? To make matters worse, these walls have writings on them. Writings to remind you of why you have failed once again.

Sometimes, you’re stuck with someone else. But that person doesn’t know what to do either. Just moments ago, both people were cruising along happily, skipping down the road, humming happy tunes. Then the path gets sinister – roots start sticking out from the ground, the sky above darkens, the flowers wither, the wind howls – and then before you know it, a wall’s in front of you both. The wall’s screaming of past failures, unresolved matters. The past has once again been dug up.

I guess the only way to overcome that, is for both people to hold on. Whatever past failures, they are the past. It’s the present that counts. The both of you might be caught in the worse thunderstorm ever, but just continue to hold on and shelter each other. The rain will soon stop, the sun will come out once again, and there will be a beautiful rainbow in the sky.

–

On a happier note, met up with the poly mates last night to celebrate Kat’s birthday at Thai Express for dinner and drinks at Harry’s Bar. Superb company. Everyone is still the same. And I’m extremely grateful for their friendshipship. :) Over the years in poly, we’ve all grown so much.

Sigh… I’d love to continue blogging, but, as you can tell, I’m not in the best of moods. My heart still feels weighed down, and my stomach still feels nauseated.

Goodbye for now, world. Goodbye.

God, please be our strength.

My darling is gooooone….. :((((

To Batam… On his company’s retreat. He’s on the ferry already and my heart’s already pining for him. Thank God he’ll be back soon – Sunday afternoon.

Please be safe and hug me tightly when you return into my arms on Sunday ok? :)

We might be going to Genting together (with his parents) in Jan next year. I’ve yet to ask my parents, but I do hope they’ll give consent. And that the trip will really come to pass.

We’ve always been talking about going overseas together and I’ve been dreaming about it for the longest time.
The morning will start off with the warm sunshine shining through the windows. After washing up and getting ready, we’ll go down to the hotel restaurant for a good, hearty breakfast. After which, we would set out on our adventure for the day – walk the streets, play at theme parks, have meals by the streets, go shopping, laugh through the day. When night comes, there’s no hurry to return. We’ll soak in the night life and finally stumble back to the hotel – not drunk – but delirious from all the laughing and fun we had. :)

Last night, while I was with Reid helping him settle some stuff he needed for his trip, he said the sweetest two-line poem to me. :) It was totally spontaneous and I know it came from the most bottomest of his heart. I don’t even think he meant it to be a poem.

Have you heard the song “I Do” by Dashboard Confessional? It’s soooo sweeeeeet! I’m thinking of asking Reid to sing it to me on our wedding day. Hahahaha. :D
Have a listen:
(argh! wordpress can’t embed imeem!!! and youtube doesn’t have the videeeeeeo!) Just click here: http://www.imeem.com/cradledamnation/music/tUbTGQxH/dashboard_confessional_i_do/

Hmmm. I feel like eating Wang Wang xiao man tous. So I shall go buy them now.

:)

BB DD!